Saturday, October 16, 2010

Sexting

Have you heard of the allegations against Brett Favre?

For our readers who don't live in the U.S. or aren't football fans, he is a famous football player accused of sending pictures of his dick to a woman who worked for his team and was about 15 years younger than him and rejected his advances.

The details and the photos can be found on deadspin.com. He sent them about two years ago and the woman who received them never went public but showed them to friends and one of them apparently sold the photos to the the website.

So I thought I'd poll our readers. If a co-worker ever sent a photo like that to you, would you report him or would you let it pass? And if you are familiar with the Favre case, what was your reaction to him?

FD

19 comments:

  1. As a famous FB player -- he is in a position of power over someone who works for the team -- even if she doesn't report to him....so doing this could be seen as a sexual harrassment issue.

    Seriously -- there are billions of women in the world who do not work for your company.

    send your penis to them.

    sfp

    PS --unless we ask to see it -- don't send it to us.

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  2. i'm with sfp...
    don't send till we ask!

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  3. Wow I am out of the loop because I hadn't heard of this story till I read your post. However, I agree with Alujna, don't send till we ask. As far as having a problem with it, I definitely would if it were harassing and unwanted. But I've had a couple of coworkers that I wouldn't have minded traded sexy pics with... :)

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  4. If anyone I worked with sent a picture to me I would turn them in. It would have been something I would never have asked for and wouldn't want to see!

    Sexting even between friends isn't really smart because it's so easy for the pictures to be seen and missed used by others. But absolute never should anyone send something that has not been requested!

    Hugs,
    PK

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  5. I normally have two reactions - either laughing hysterically, wanting to know "I am looking at what? where?.." or being suitably impressed..

    Seriously though, I agree - unless I have asked for it, unwanted photos is nothing more than sexual harrassment, and I would not hesitate to report such a person.

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  6. I think if I were to get one from someone I had ZERO interest in, it might be time to find a moment to pull that guy aside and tell him, "Look, I'm flattered that you think I'm worth this, but I'm not interested, please don't do it again."

    And if he did it again, hang his ass out to dry.

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  7. The problem is that the woman he allegedly sent the picture to obviously didn't have a problem with it. She never went public. She never filed charges of any sort. She obviously wasn't bothered. It baffles me that it is a big deal now. I agree that he probably shouldn't have done it if it was not requested, but we don't even know if that was case! She's not talking about it. For all we know, she requested the pictures and they had some sort of affair. Most of all, it's not my business.

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  8. I am a second chancer. Do it once and I reply with a no thank you, please don't send that again. If it happens again... I wouldn't be so nice.

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  9. Obviously, she didn't have a problem with it or she would have reported it. Just drop it already.
    PY

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  10. Hmm I think maybe she is young?
    I don;t really know. I do remember the same sort of thing happening to me as a 23 YO working in an office of mostly men in NYC. Well not sexting cause it didn't exist way back then~~ but overt sexual behavior was pretty much the rule of the day at that office.
    I never said a word and pretended it never happened.
    I'm appalled when I look back at that .. I guess I wasn't "empowered" by my mother.

    Sticky question and if it happened now.. well it is one strike and you are out~~ !

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  11. I personally would report him but seems the lady he sent them to didn't mind at all. The one that sold them, I wonder how much she got.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

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  12. I had lots to say so I wrote my own post and linked here. Good topic. I think it's complicated I guess.

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  13. If it happened today, I would turn in the bum. But when I was 23 and working in an office for mainly men, there wasn't much you could do. As for me, the harassment was fairly continual. In the 80's, there wasn't the awareness, nor the laws that protect women (and men) today. You took it or moved onto a new job. I moved onto new jobs. What these horndogs don't realize is that they are in a position of power. They hold the keys to your paycheck. If you fight them, you don't eat. One boss grabbed my breasts, shoved his hard dick up against me and chased me around his stupid office. I finally quit when I couldn't take it anymore. But there was no recourse back then. If I'd lodged a formal complaint, he would have come out looking great and I would have looked like a slut. I'm really glad things have changed. Brett needs to be spanked for this one. Abuse of power, degradation of subordinates, it all sucks when you're the one being harassed. He should have known better. And as far as the girl waiting two years, sometimes you don't want to acknowledge the abuse if you liked the person. I liked the boss that harassed me until it got too intense. Only after I quit did I realize how bad it was. If I ran into him now, I'd kick his ass. Brett needs to pay for this.

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  14. If I was in a situation where some guy sent me unwanted pictures of things I really didn't want/need to see, I'd absolutely report him. This is the type of thing that could easily escalate into something much bigger. If you don't report him and there aren't any consequences for him, he may decide that this is something you want or welcome - not cool. Besides, it's always best to protect yourself. If you have further problems with him and it comes out that you didn't report the first unwanted pictures, people will most likely believe that you led him on or wanted it in some way. Sad but true.

    And I have to disagree with you a bit, Michelle Carlyle. These men KNOW that they are in a position of power and KNOW (or knew) that they can/could get away with being disgusting.

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  15. If I was sent an unsolicited photo by a co-worker, I would have no hestitation in reporting it. It is a form of sexual assault.

    I know nothing about the case you are quoting, but taking it on what you have said, the 'friend' that sold the photos is just as much as a fucktard as the guy who sent the pics.

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  16. If it was all a big deal, why didn't she report it sooner if not immediately. Surely that violates the Jets' sexual harassment policy...

    Even though Favre is married, the recorded phone call didn't sound that menacing or anything.

    I think she may be chasing dollars, or she's looking for some other kind of payoff from this... (i.e., a reality show, a modeling contract,...)

    ~shoes~

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  17. I see no issue here.

    She was 23, it happended two years ago, she did not report it to HR because she obviously did not care. Stop making a victim.

    As for unprompted genital pics. Create a profile, post it to any vanilla site and see what you get. Post it on a lifestyle site and it is all you will see.

    Genitalia fly around cyberspace unrestrained. I worked in an area where we often transferred memory from data devices (phones, desktop and laptop computers). I believe upwards of 50% of the people carrying a device today have taken a crotch shot. I know what I've seen and no it isn't the creepy looking people. It is the 'normal' ones. That is just in my age group. Younger people do it ALL the time.

    The young woman from Duke University who ranked her lovers? Not as unusual as we would all hope.

    As for him being married. For every ten men who contact me on dating websites, seven are married. Marriage no longer seems to mean exclusivity for many people.

    It did not bother her, if it had she would have contacted HR. She did not, someone else saw an opportunity to make money.

    If anything it makes me rethink blogging, ttwd and anything that exposes me to the public. None of us are as anonymous as we think we are, lol, I don't have to be a hacker to run down everyone who posted a comment to this site. It isn't rocket science.

    Yet, we take a 'tone', lol, shame on Brett or shame on us, lol.

    CD

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  18. a long time brett favre fan, i was saddened by the pathetic nature of the whole thing. (i mean seriously, brett, crocs?) he must have many, many women who would like to sleep with him, but this young woman clearly isn't one of them. do you think the penis shot is real? i mean, have you seen the way his hands wrap around a football?! ok, all joking aside, his wife is now going on a media tour to talk about her book, her cancer, her faith. blah blah blah. maybe this whole thing was a marketing gimmick to get her book sales up?

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  19. I am not saying what Brett did was right but as for me I would have kept it to myself. Unless it effects my job I would have just let it be....but I am an open person so things like that dont bother me.

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