Thursday, December 29, 2011

Father of the Bride

Yes, that would be me.

For the second and last time, I will be the Father of the Bride on New Year's Eve.

Yes, my younger daughter decided that New Year's Eve would be perfect for a wedding and to ring in the New Year.

She was fortunate to find a wonderful guy who even meets my standards -- showing that online dating can work very well -- but the timing means a hectic weekend for me after just getting back into town Tuesday after spending Christmas with the grandkids. And now it is back on a plane Friday. And she says I have to give a wedding toast. I told her I write erotic stories, not wedding toasts. Well, I didn't tell her that but jumped on the Internet for some thoughts I can steal.

I'm sure it is going to be an exciting, wonderful weekend but a hectic one as well.

And hope you all have a Happy New Year.

FD

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Christmas with the Grandkids

Life doesn't get much better than spending Christmas with the grandkids.

If you have grandchildren, you understand what I mean. They're an 8-year-old girl and an 9-year-old boy and they're so cute and funny. I wasn't able to fly in until 11 a.m. Christmas morn and they didn't even complain about waiting until I arrived to open the presents.

I asked the granddaughter last night if I was going to get a goodnight hug and she said you got one last night.

She got a camera for Christmas and said if she had a cord, she could upload them on Facebook but she wasn't allowed to have a Facebook page until she's 13. My daughter -- her mother -- said 18. She said she will be out of the house by then. I am curious when she actually does get on Facebook.

And when the boy asked if I liked twizzlers, I said I didn't know what they were. She said google them and then she pointed to images and she said click on that. I said you google at 8 and she said you didn't think I knew that. I google. These kids today are so computer savvy at such a young age.

I wish I could think of some of the other funny things they said.

Anyway, the turkey and the trimmings were great and enjoyed having leftovers, including turkey sandwiches, all day Monday, and my daughter even made a second chocolate pie because it was one of my favorites.

But the time with the grandkids made it so nice.

Hope you all had a merry and happy Christmas and that you have a Happy New Year.

FD

Saturday, December 24, 2011

12 days of BDSM Christmas

I found this on Sky's website.

Enjoy and Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all of my blogger friends who have enriched my life. I treasure your friendship. Hope you and yours are having a wonderful holiday season.

Here's the link:


FD

Thursday, December 22, 2011

A Kiss

Here's a video of a woman in the Navy coming into port and giving her partner a kiss, something that they can do in public now that gays are allowed to serve openly in the military.

http://video.msnbc.msn.com/msnbc-tv/45756894/#45756894

It shows that times are changing.

For many in the younger generation, being gay is like being lefthanded. A bit different from the majority but no big deal.

FD

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Gender

Here's an interesting story about a 7 year old transgendered person living as a girl -- looks like a girl in the picture -- who wanted to join the girl scouts. The girl scouts were OK with this. They said if a person lives as a girl they can join. But the leaders of this particular troop disbanded rather than admit her.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/12/21/girl-scout-troops-transgender-child-disband_n_1163971.html?ref=gay-voices

There's the link. Will be interested in your thoughts.

FD

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Taste

In my last post, I talked about the taste of lobster. Now a a discussion of a different taste. About a month ago on Michael and Grace's blog, she described a scene and said, "He wanted me to suck him again...after he'd been in me. Oh, how I hate that...I don't like the taste and just the idea of it makes me cringe. But he made his wishes clear and I want to please him...thankfully, he didn't make me linger there too long and he let me know he knew it wasn't something I enjoyed and he appreciated me doing it for him.''

Then in one of the comments, t1klish, who is often kind enough to comment here, said she doesn't like tasting herself. And she said she doesn't think women like tasting their bodily fluids.

Here's the link if you want to read it all:


I think that some women disagree with Grace and t1klish and like the taste. I googled it and the proper term seems to be vaginal lubrication although pussy juice is often used.

So I thought I'd ask. Do you like to taste yourself or not?

I hope you will share your thoughts.

FD

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Lobster Feast

I love lobster and the fish store near me has started selling them on occasion $5 cheaper when they decide to steam them than when they sell them live. It's crazy that they do the work of cooking them (hate putting the live lobsters in the boiling water) and then sell them cheaper. I guess maybe they have too many that didn't sell live and need to cook them. So I just have to bring them home and take them out of the shells and saute or microwave them to warm them up.

Needless to say, whenever they have the sign up that they are selling the steamed ones, I usually stop by. So today, I've had lobsters for both lunch and dinner. Hmmmmm.

Don't know if we have any other lobster lovers out there but if you are, you know I am having a good day. I can really think of only one thing I love the taste of better. I'll leave that to your imagination.

FD

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Wearing Panties

In my last post, I asked about wearing thongs and some readers said they don't wear panties or are told not to wear them.

So I thought I'd ask a followup about wearing panties. Do you usually wear them? If not, do your prefer not to or have you been instructed not to?

FD

Friday, December 9, 2011

Wearing thongs or g-strings

In my last post, there were a couple of comments from women about thongs and/or g-strings being uncomfortable to wear.

So I thought I would ask the readers. Do you wear them? Do you like them?

I've always thought some women like them because they don't show panty lines. I googled them and there seem to be plenty for sale so some women must buy them.

Anyway, the floor is open for your thoughts.

FD

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

20 Things to Know About Your Vagina

I found this article by Dr. Lissa Rankin and thought you might find it interesting. She also has a website called owningpink.com that you might check out.

Here's the link:

http://www.owningpink.com/2010/02/18/20-things-every-woman-should-know-about-her-vagina

You can read them all but I thought I'd mention two things. She recommended not to douche and to feel good about your lips whether they are tucked in or visible.

If the readers want to discuss the topic, I thought I'd ask if any of you do douche. And are your lips tucked in or visible and do you like the way they look? She said however they look, they are normal and women should embrace how they look.

I'd be interested in your thoughts.

FD

Monday, December 5, 2011

Teen sexting

Here's an article to give you one less thing to worry about if you have teens. It says that teen sexting is much less common than people think it is. It also says teens are programmed to do dumb things -- no surprise there -- because their brains aren't fully mature.

Although there do seem to be plenty of adult women -- or at least over the legal age of 18 -- who are happy to post naked photos on some websites.

Also, a funny comment in the story on the walls about cavemen drawing nude pictures on the walls. In Arizona, there is a civilization that disappeared and they're not sure what happened to them. But you can take a tour of where they lived and on the wall is a stick figure of a well endowed guy.

Anyway, here's the link. Sounds like a few isolated incidents gave the impression that sexting is rampant among teens.

http://news.yahoo.com/few-teens-sexting-racy-photos-research-says-050226825.html

FD

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Unbelieveable Part II

Here's another story on how women are treated in other countries. A foloup on the story about the woman who has to marry her rapist to get out of jail.

Anyway, here's a story on how advisors in Saudi Arabia are saying that if you let women drive, it will lead to them having sex.

Here is the link:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/12/03/saudi-arabia-women-driving_n_1127021.html?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmaing6%7Cdl1%7Csec1_lnk3%7C117569

And we keep poring money into these repressive places because they have oil. Crazy.

FD

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Unbelieveable

Check out this story. A woman is raped in Pakistan and goes to jail for having sex outside of marriage and the only way she gets out is marry her attacker.

Here's the link:


And aren't they suppose to be an ally of ours?

How can this happen in the 21st century?

FD

Friday, December 2, 2011

Women voters

I found this story interesting that more women than men voted in the 2008 election and that women made Obama the president because he got only 49 per cent of the male vote.

Here's a link to the story:


I hope you find it as interesting as I did.

FD

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Hollywood Secret

Here is what I think is a fascinating story about Loretta Young and Clark Gable having a daughter and the daughter wasn't told until she was an adult.


I just thought I'd share it with you. Can't help thinking about how times have changed. In today's Hollywood, it would be viewed much differently.

FD



Saturday, November 26, 2011

Pussy Pride

This was written several months ago and maybe you've seen it, but I just came across this post by a blogger who says women should be proud of their pussies and said, "I have been shocked at the number of women who look at their themselves and see fault with their pussy.'' She also writes, "Your pussy or whatever you want to call it, is beautiful. They are all unique and wonderful in their own way.''

She also links to an art work by Jamie McCartney called The Great Wall of Vagina. He took casts of 400 of them and the exhibit has 10 panels of 40 casts per panel. He said he was perturbed at the number of women who have a negative view of their genitals. And one blogger linked to a book called Vulva: 101, a coffee table book showing vulvas.

Anyway, here's the link to the Pussy Pride project:


So do you take pride in yours? I thought I'd see how many women want to comment.

FD

Friday, November 25, 2011

Black Friday Madness

Here are two videos and stories about Black Friday madness at two Wal-Mart stores in different parts of the country. I know I already did one post on Black Friday but I figured I would share these two stories if you missed them.

One about shoppers getting aggressive in getting $2 waffle makers and the other about a guy being tasered.

America in the 21st century:


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/11/25/black-friday-wal-mart-violence_n_1113401.html

FD


Thursday, November 24, 2011

Black Thursday

The day after Thanksgiving madness used to be called Black Friday. But now I see it is creeping into Thursday. Watching the games on TV, I saw ads for sales beginning at midnight or even sooner.

I have to admit my older daughter often gets caught up in the madness and so when I called her tonight to give her Thanksgiving wishes, I asked if she was going out tonight. She said she was already in line. This was before 9 p.m. and the mall didn't open until midnight. She was only upset they wouldn't let them in the mall and were making them stand outside in the cold. She had planned to just read a book while waiting. And she said the line was around the block at Toys R Us, which opened at 9 p.m.

So I had to ask how many of you get caught up in Black Friday and whether the savings are worth it.

And hope you all had a good Thanksgiving. I am stuffed on turkey and stuffing and all the trimmings. And did many of you watch the parades on Thanksgiving morning or even go to them in person?

And can Christmas be just a month away? Where does the time go?

FD

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Turkey Day

I am always interested in traditions.

How many of you will have turkey on Thanksgiving Day . If so, do you like turkey or it is just a tradition. If not do you prefer another food?

Are you spending it with relatives? Traveling or home?

And do you watch football on Turkey Day?

Thanks for sharing and Happy Thanksgiving everyone. And may you and yours have a good day and hope you can have some play time.

FD

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Faking Orgasms

I did a post recently on Women and Relationships that included the topic of faking orgasms, especially whether a man could do it. One of our male bloggers (1manview) explained how a guy can do it and you can go back and read the comments if you wish.

Today, though, I would like to discuss women faking it. We know so many women do and they are good at it as Meg Ryan showed in the famous scene in "When Harry Met Sally.'' It is on YouTube if you missed it. She fakes it in a deli because he says women never fake it with him and he can tell the difference. And after she does it, a woman in the deli -- I think in real life it is Billy Crystal's mother -- says, "I'll have what she is having.'''

Anyway, I wanted to ask women how often they fake it and why they fake it. To get it over with? To make the guy feel good about themselves? Because they don't want to admit it is not happening or they are one of those women who don't orgasm easily?

I also wonder if it is more difficult for a women to fake it in a long term relationship when the guy is more familiar with their reactions when they do cum. How can you fake getting wet, for example? Or do too many guys not pay enough attention to what is happening with the women so it is easy to fake.

I hope you will share your thoughts on this topic.

FD


Sunday, November 13, 2011

Bondage

Are there many of you who are into bondage?

I found this link to a picture of bondage that I thought was really well done. Here's the link:


I thought it would be interesting to hear your thoughts on bondage and whether
it is one of your kinks.

FD

150,000

I just looked at my counter and see I passed 150,000 views. And over 320 followers. I just want to thank all of you who stop by and keep stopping by. You make this blog by dropping in, especially those of you who comment on my sometimes quirky observations and even the very personal ones.

I must admit that when PK convinced me to start blogging over two years ago, I was kind of humoring her. I really didn't think I would find an audience. Especially since I was in the minority of men who blog, but PK insisted the women would like a man's point of view.

Again, thank you. You have made this blog. And I will write another story again soon. And now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

FD

Friday, November 11, 2011

Too Tired for Sex

I found this article on the Huffington Post. Here's the link:


You can read it but the woman in New York City writes she and her husband haven't had sex for a month. They have demanding jobs, two kids and are often too tired for sex. But she likes to flirt. My feeling is that they have their priorities out of order.

Anyway, if you read it, will be interested in your thoughts.

FD

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Love Our Lurkers Day VI

Hello!!!

If you are a lurker who reads blogs, you have probably already noticed that today is Love Our Lurkers day, which was the brainchild of Bonnie, the woman I call the Godmother of spanking blogs. She has done so much to bring this community together.

Here is a link to her blog:

Anyway, this is the day she encourages lurkers to sign up and say hello and join the community.

Don't be shy. We are a welcoming community of people with similar interests. We are eager to hear from you. All bloggers can tell you that we love comments so we get feedback from our readers.

I was once a lurker once who was convinced by Bonnie to sign up and start commenting. It wasn't long before I started making friends and was convinced by PK (elisnewbeginnngs.blogspot.com) to start writing stories and start my own blog.

But first things first. Just sign up and start commenting. I love your feedback, especially since my format is to tend to ask a lot of questions.

So if you are still on the fence, try it. I'd love to hear from you. And feel free to email me at swdftbscribe@aol.com

If you are reading the blogs, you have an interest in the community. Sign up and start commenting and become a more active member. And even if you don't sign up, you are always welcome here.

FD

Saturday, November 5, 2011

The C Word

I found this video on the origin of the word cunt on Aisha's blog. I found it quite interesting.

Here's the link:

http://beingaisha.wordpress.com/2011/11/05/cunt/

And what are your thoughts on the word?

FD

Friday, November 4, 2011

Women and Relationships

I found this article on MSN from a Cosmopolitan survey on women and relationships.

It had some interesting tidbits:

--38 per cent of women feel they should share the cost of dates. A total of 33 per cent want the guy to pay.

--73 per cent are comfortable with making more money than their guy and 12 per cent are in a relationship where the woman makes more.

--54 per cent of women have faked an orgasm and 35 per cent have lied about the number of sex partners they have had. And 85 per cent would be offended if a guy faked an orgasm with you. Do guys fake orgasms?

And now here's the tidbit I was most interested in. Thirty-five per cent say "being dominated'' is the sexual act they most often fantasize about.

Interesting. Maybe there are more submissives out there than we thought.

Anyway, here's the link:


Will be interested in hearing your thoughts.

FD

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Matching Body and Gender

I've often thought transgender people are dealt a cruel hand by nature. It must be traumatic to be born in the wrong body.

It is good that surgery can now fix the problem. If you google the name of Alexsa Lundberg, you will find pictues of a good looking Swedish actress who was born a male but knew early on, she was supposed to be a female.

The crazy thing is that in Sweden, the law is that transgender people must be sterilized before they have the operation and they can't even freeze sperm legally. I thought Europe was a more progress place than the U.S. in dealing with such issues.

Anyway, here is a link to a story about her:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/11/02/transgender-forced-sterilization_n_1071328.html

I will be interested in your thoughts.

FD

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Sex on Your Wedding Night

I found this interesting article about sex on the wedding night. Here is the link:


It talks about how the couple can be totally stressed out or had too much to drink and it isn't the
magical night you would expect.

So how was sex on your wedding night?

I hope you will share your experience.

FD

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Taboo

Having sex during your period may not be a taboo subject but it isn't discussed that frequently. I was reminded of that when Kitty did a post on the subject. Here's the link:


Are there other bloggers out there who want to share their thoughts and experiences
on the subject?

FD

Monday, October 24, 2011

Lisa's Training Chapter 12

Your comments on Kitty's post and on mine when I linked to the stories were so flattering that I felt I had to write another chapter. I just hope I can keep living up to your expectations. I am still surprised at the positive reaction because I haven't done erotic writing in the past.

If you read any of the previous 11 stories on my previous post or Kitty's latest post (http://kitty-sweetsurrender.blogspot.com/2011/10/affected-by-florida-dom.html), you know that Lisa is a smart driven professional woman who is a submissive in her personal life and is finally exploring her submissive side with her new Master. So here goes:

Lisa's Training Chapter 12

It was one of those picture perfect fall afternoons with the leaves turning and Lisa loved those beautiful fall days.

She loved sleeping in on Saturday mornings in cool weather with the windows open and felt very refreshed. She got up and went to the computer naked as her Master required and sat on the piece of sandpaper and write her morning email to him. She was required to check in with him in the morning, but it was now something she wanted to do. Her day didn't seem right without letting him know how she felt and what she was thinking.

She used to keep her emotions bottled up, but he had worked on her sharing her inner most thoughts with him. She then took a shower and loved the feeling of the warm water spraying on her body. She would have loved to put her hands between her legs and rub her clit, but she was only allowed to rub with his permission and she wouldn't feel comfortable rubbing without permission. She always wanted to please his master.

She did enjoy washing her unshaved armpits. It seemed strange when he first told her not to shave her pits, but now she loved doing that for him because she felt like it was his mark on her and she so loved making him happy.

She was having breakfast when her phone rang and her pussy twitched when she saw it was his number. It always did. She always loved hearing from him. She wanted to serve him and give him what he wanted.

He told her it was too nice a day to waste inside and that they were going to go to a secluded park they both loved to spend the day. Of course, he always told her what they were going to do. He made all the decisions in their relationship. She called the shots on her job but she loved following his lead in their relationship.

He told her to go to the deli to get a picnic lunch and they would eat near the pond and feed the ducks some crumbs. He said he'd pick her up in an hour and to wear panties, slacks and a weatshirt with no bra. He liked easy access to her tits and she liked him to have that easy access.

Her Master arrived right on time and she melted when she opened the door. She loved his looks and his scent and he pulled her tight and gave her a sensuous kiss and slid his hands under her sweatshirt and rubbed her tits. She loved that. And then he slid his hands inside her panties and found she was already wet. Just seeing him still made her wet. He got his fingers wet and then sucked on them. She loved that he so enjoyed tasting her juices. And then he reached inside her panties for more juices and had her suck them off his fingers. Oh, she also liked her own juices but was now only allowed to taste with his permission. She was thinking this had the makings of a wonderful day.

He opened the door to the car and when she sat down, he told her to pull her panties and slacks to her thighs. He loved her sitting in the car on her naked butt. The next thing she knew he was putting his hands between her leg and sliding something in her pussy. When she felt the buzzing she knew it was the remote controlled silver vibrating bullet and he had the remote. Oh, this day was looking even better.

As he drove to the park, he buzzed her every few minutes and she was getting so turned on. And then he would reach over and rub her clit as she leaned back in the seat with her legs spread and eyes closed and moaned. Oh, she loved him doing that to her.

She was brought back to reality when they arrived at the pond and parked. He said let's go for a walk before we have lunch. She loved walking hand in hand with him as he buzzed the vibe from time to time and pulled her close to him for a sweet kiss now and then. Oh, Lisa was getting so wet. She could feel her thighs and her panties were damp. She felt so good knowing that he wanted her and that she wanted to give herself to him and she wanted him to take what he wanted. She wanted him to use her body for his pleasure.

And then he veered them towards a secluded area filled with trees that wasn't easy to see from the main walk as the leaves crunched under their feet. And then he pointed to a big true and told her to stand with her hands outstretched against it with his legs spread. And then he pulled down her slacks and panties to her knees and her sweatshirt up to her navel. His ass and pussy were naked and she was so embarrassed being this way in public and hoping that nobody would come by. But she obeyed. She always obeyed. And she was getting wetter. She could feel her juices dripping on her thighs. And he put his hands between her legs and said, "Oh, what do we have here?'' He loved getting her wet. He knew she wanted what was coming even if she was embarrassed to be in public.

He then took a blindfold out of her pocket and blindfolded her. He wanted her to concentrate on what was coming. When she heard the sound of a branch cracking, she had a pretty good idea that he was going to use it as a cane.

He just said one word, "count.'' She knew what was expected. She was to count out the number of blows he delivered. As the first one cracked into her ass, she gasped and said, "One Master.'' Oh, that branch hurt. She knew that was going to be quite a spanking. And he kept it up. Ten, Twenty, Thirty, Forty.. Fifty. She kept counting but she cried out after each one. And he was buzzing her pussy at the same time. The sensation of the buzzing and the blows was making her so wet. She was gushing as her juices ran down her thighs. But she was crying, too. She wanted to make him happy, but he was pushing her limits. She was having trouble standing up. Her ass felt raw.

And he finally stopped and waited as she gathered herself. Her ass felt like it was on fire. Yet she was so wet. She knew she wanted to take the beating for him. She wanted to please him and be a good slave her him. And then he moved close to her and dried her tears and gave her a big kiss and she felt so good knowing she had made him happy. And then he tenderly rubbed her bottom.

He then told her to get on her hands and knees and she felt lube being inserted in her ass. She knew she was going to get an ass fucking. And with the vibe buzzing, he slowed pushed his cock into her ass and slammed it in and then started fucking her in and out, in and out. Oh, she felt so filled with the vibe in her pussy and the cock in her ass and she was panting and moaning and begging, "Oh, please, Master, will you let me cum. I want to cum for you. Let me cum Master.'' And he told her to keep begging. "Oh, please, Master, I need a cum, please let me cum, I want to cum for you.''

And then she said, "Cum for me.'' And she exploded in an orgasm that went through her body and made her gush. Oh, she loved what he did to her. She loved the way he took her body.

He then had her clean his cock with her mouth and she loved that.

And then he was very tender as he rubbed her back and cuddled with her in the leaves. Oh, she loved the way he cuddled with her and whispered in her ear, "You belong to me. You belong to me. You belong to me.''

She felt so content as they cuddled together and he wrapped his arms around her and then he finally got up and gave her a big hug and the walked hand in hand back to the car and got the picnic lunch.

And then they sat eating and tossing scraps to the ducks. It was the end of a perfect afternoon. Anybody seeing them would think they were just another vanilla couple enjoying a day in the park. Little did they know her thighs were sticky with her juices and his cum.
Little did they know that he had taken her once again and that she had loved serving him.

Little did they know.

--The End--

Sunday, October 23, 2011

The Lisa stories

Many of my newer readers (and I want to thank all of you for reading and commenting) don't realize I started this blog writing a series of stories about a professional woman who was a tiger in the board room and a submissive in the bedroom. I wrote 11 of them, but I haven't written another one in over a year. I can be a champion procrastinator.

Anyway, one of my favorite bloggers, Kitty, recently went back in the archives and read all 11 of them and posted about how much she liked them. As a writer, it's always so gratifying to read good things about your writing. I thank her and all the bloggers who commented positively. And if you like them, PK gets a lot of the credit. She convinced me to start writing them when I wasn't sure they would find an audience or that I could even write erotica.

I also was unsure of how far to take the series. I am into more BDSM than some spankos, but I've enjoyed the comments from bloggers who say they wouldn't want to do some of the things in the stories, but enjoyed reading about them.

And the part where she serves other men isn't even a fantasy of mine. I wouldn't want to share a sub, but I felt it might spice up the stories.

I recommend you read and follow Kitty's blog and not just because she wrote about me.

Here's the link to her post:


In her post, she has a link to the first Lisa story. But I decided to link to all 11.

Here's a link to Chapter 1


Here's a link to Chapter 2:


And Chapter 3


And Chapter 4


And Chapter 5


And Chapter 6


And Chapter 7


And Chapter 8


And Chapter 9


Add Chapter 10


And Chapter 11


Those are the 11 chapters. If you read them, I hope you enjoy them. And I may finally write another chapter soon.

FD




Friday, October 21, 2011

Who You Are

At the bottom is a link to a fascinating NY Times column about a new book called "Thinking, Fast and Slow.''

The writer of the column says the research in this book will be remembered hundreds of years from now.

It says all humans share similar sets of biases. There is such a thing as universal human nature. And we have much less control over ourselves than we thought. And they say if you are studying something, work with people you disagree with. That's a hard one.

It also says people will guy more soup if a sign says Limit 12 to a customer.

And Israeli parole boards grant parole 35 per cent of the time except in the hour just after mealtime. Then it is 65 per cent.

Pro golfers putt more accurately when they are putting for par than for a birdie. They fear the bogey more than they desire the birdie.

It sounds a bit heavy but I guess you click on the link and see for yourself. And the book is likely to be worth reading.

Here's the link:

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/21/opinion/brooks-who-you-are.html?_r=1&hp

FD

Saturday, October 15, 2011

What is IT about Marilyn Monroe?

I just saw a story about more lost photos of Marilyn Monroe being published for the first time. It seems like there are always more photos of her being found.

Here is a link to one of them:


It is one of 20 pictures if you want to look at more.

She is obviously a beautiful woman but there are a lot of beautiful women in Hollywood. And to me she wasn't Ingrid Bergman in Casablanca when it comes to being a woman who captivated me. What do you think made her an icon? Was dying young part of it so we never saw her aging like Elizabeth Taylor? Or did she have a special charisma that jumped off the screen?

I'd be curious to hear your thoughts.

FD

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Maintenance Sex

I think we're all aware of maintenance spankings but was interested in finding a reference to maintenance sex by a sex therapist named Tammy Nelson on the Huffington Post.

She described that maintenance sex is sex is sex on the same night, in the same place, in the same way with little variation. She said couples in this phase need to work to make sex more exciting. She said couples should talk and not assume their partner knows what they want and need. She said teaching each other can create a lifetime of exotic connection. And have your partner repeat back what you said to make sure your partner understands what you mean.

This sounds like good advice and I feel that couples in D/s relationships tend not to get in a rut because they are involved in scenes.

Let me know what you think. Is D/s sex better? Do you try to avoid maintenance sex?

FD

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Cherish the Moment

I got another reminder recently that we should cherish every moment. I played tennis last Thursday night with a good guy who emailed me that night that he enjoyed playing and added Rule No 1 Always Have Fun.

On Saturday morning, he died of a heart attack at age 61. So young. I was shocked to say the least. I went to the wake last night and talked to his widow. It is so difficult to find anything to say that isn't trite.

It was just another reminder that we should cherish today because tomorrow is never guaranteed.

FD

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Feet

I recently mentioned the book "A Billion Wicked Thoughts'' and the Internet research they did on what people like.

It turns out breasts, butts and feet are the three most popular searches. So does the man in your life like to play with your feet or toes? Or not? And does he like you to wear high heels in bed? And is it a turnoff for you if he wears socks in bed?

Tell us about whether your feet are involved in your play.

FD

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Meeting a Friend and Fellow Blogger

If you read PK's blog, you know we had lunch after becoming blogging friends for the past three years. This is the first time I've met one of my online friends.

In case you missed it, here is what she wrote about it:


As she said, it was a great lunch and there were none of the usual awkward moments that you sometimes have in a conversation when you meet someone for the first time. But then even though we hadn't met in person, we know each other so well from sharing our lives online that it wasn't like a first meeting. More like two old friends getting together again. And fun talking about our lives and the various bloggers we both read. And how Cassie had been in her head when she was just a kid. So nice she is able to share her with us.

If you read my blog, you know I often call her my mentor. She convinced me to start writing stories (which I need to start doing again) and to start a blog. She even set it up for me because I tend to be a computer clueless type.

And she is a wonderful wife and mother. Nick is so lucky to have her. And she raised two delightful kids who have left the nest and are making their way in the world although she is so modest, she takes no credit and simply says she didn't screw them up. If you know her, she deserves plenty of credit.

And nice that Nick has no issues when her becoming online friends with a guy although I've always felt married couples should be able to have friends of the opposite sex. One of my high school classmates lives in my town and we have lunch occasionally (she has no idea about my dom side) and the husband sometimes joins us for lunch, talks sports a while and then leaves as we continue to chit chat. Many guys don't like to talk about their lives but I enjoy it.

Anyway, if you read enjoy reading PK's blog and become friends with her, I hope you do you do get to meet her sometime. You will be glad you did.

FD

Saturday, September 24, 2011

What Happened to Middle Class America?

If you are old enough, you may remember when America tended to be a middle class country.
Here's a column showing how all that has changed as policy shifted from the middle class to the wealthy. I found it interesting:

FD

The Social Contract

This week President Obama said the obvious: that wealthy Americans, many of whom pay remarkably little in taxes, should bear part of the cost of reducing the long-run budget deficit. And Republicans like Representative Paul Ryan responded with shrieks of “class warfare.”

Fred R. Conrad/The New York Times

Paul Krugman

Related in Opinion
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Do Taxes Narrow the Wealth Gap?

Obama wants to tax the rich. Republicans say he's promoting class warfare. What's the role of tax policy in bridging a wealth gap?

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It was, of course, nothing of the sort. On the contrary, it’s people like Mr. Ryan, who want to exempt the very rich from bearing any of the burden of making our finances sustainable, who are waging class war.

As background, it helps to know what has been happening to incomes over the past three decades. Detailed estimates from the Congressional Budget Office — which only go up to 2005, but the basic picture surely hasn’t changed — show that between 1979 and 2005 the inflation-adjusted income of families in the middle of the income distribution rose 21 percent. That’s growth, but it’s slow, especially compared with the 100 percent rise in median income over a generation after World War II.

Meanwhile, over the same period, the income of the very rich, the top 100th of 1 percent of the income distribution, rose by 480 percent. No, that isn’t a misprint. In 2005 dollars, the average annual income of that group rose from $4.2 million to $24.3 million.

So do the wealthy look to you like the victims of class warfare?

To be fair, there is argument about the extent to which government policy was responsible for the spectacular disparity in income growth. What we know for sure, however, is that policy has consistently tilted to the advantage of the wealthy as opposed to the middle class.

Some of the most important aspects of that tilt involved such things as the sustained attack on organized labor and financial deregulation, which created huge fortunes even as it paved the way for economic disaster. For today, however, let’s focus just on taxes.

The budget office’s numbers show that the federal tax burden has fallen for all income classes, which itself runs counter to the rhetoric you hear from the usual suspects. But that burden has fallen much more, as a percentage of income, for the wealthy. Partly this reflects big cuts in top income tax rates, but, beyond that, there has been a major shift of taxation away from wealth and toward work: tax rates on corporate profits, capital gains and dividends have all fallen, while the payroll tax — the main tax paid by most workers — has gone up.

And one consequence of the shift of taxation away from wealth and toward work is the creation of many situations in which — just as Warren Buffett and Mr. Obama say — people with multimillion-dollar incomes, who typically derive much of that income from capital gains and other sources that face low taxes, end up paying a lower overall tax rate than middle-class workers. And we’re not talking about a few exceptional cases.

According to new estimates by the nonpartisan Tax Policy Center, one-fourth of those with incomes of more than $1 million a year pay income and payroll tax of 12.6 percent of their income or less, putting their tax burden below that of many in the middle class.

Now, I know how the right will respond to these facts: with misleading statistics and dubious moral claims.

On one side, we have the claim that the rising share of taxes paid by the rich shows that their burden is rising, not falling. To point out the obvious, the rich are paying more taxes because they’re much richer than they used to be. When middle-class incomes barely grow while the incomes of the wealthiest rise by a factor of six, how could the tax share of the rich not go up, even if their tax rate is falling?

On the other side, we have the claim that the rich have the right to keep their money — which misses the point that all of us live in and benefit from being part of a larger society.

Elizabeth Warren, the financial reformer who is now running for the United States Senate in Massachusetts, recently made some eloquent remarks to this effect that are, rightly, getting a lot of attention. “There is nobody in this country who got rich on his own. Nobody,” she declared, pointing out that the rich can only get rich thanks to the “social contract” that provides a decent, functioning society in which they can prosper.

Which brings us back to those cries of “class warfare.”

Republicans claim to be deeply worried by budget deficits. Indeed, Mr. Ryan has called the deficit an “existential threat” to America. Yet they are insisting that the wealthy — who presumably have as much of a stake as everyone else in the nation’s future — should not be called upon to play any role in warding off that existential threat.

Well, that amounts to a demand that a small number of very lucky people be exempted from the social contract that applies to everyone else. And that, in case you’re wondering, is what real class warfare looks like.


Friday, September 23, 2011

Ricky Spanking Lucy

I always like to come across new blogs by couples who are new to the spanking lifestyles and reading about their experiences.

Well, I just found out by Loving and it has a treat -- a picture of Ricky spanking Lucy. I don't remember this scene or seeing this picture.

I'm sure most of you have seen the reruns or if you old enough, saw them when they were first broadcast and they were a sensation in the early days of TV.

In real life, I doubt Lucy was too submissive. She was a very good business woman, especially in her day, and built a TV empire. She started the show to keep Ricky, a band leader with a wandering eye, at home instead of traveling on the road. She married Ricky in 1940 and they divorced in 1960.

An interesting sidelight is that most shows then were done live on the East Coast and shown in inferior kinescope on the West Coast. Lucy and Ricky offered to take a paycut to film the show rather than move to New York if they got the rights to the films. Which became worth millions because the show is still in syndication.

Anyway, here's a link to the picture. If any of you know the context to the scene, please share it with us.


FD

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Romance Novels

If you are a woman, do you read romance novels? You are not alone.

Another tidbit in that book "A Billion Wicked Thoughts'' is that romance novels generated $1.37 billion in sales in 2008. The romance genre has the single largest share of the fiction market. At least 74.8 million people read romance novels in 2008. And more than 90 per cent are women.

To put those numbers in perspective, about 100 million men in the U.S. and Canada accessed online porn in 2008 only a quarter more than the number of women who read romance novels. About 25 per cent of the porn watchers are women. But women won't pay for porn and the companies often flag credit cards with female names that try to pay for porn. But they will spend over $1billion on romance novels.

Another interesting thing is that sex is not absolutely essential to a romance novel. But the sex scene is important. The heroine is sexually inexperienced until her lover introduces it to her. The awakening to love is that much more powerful when it's accompanied by a sexual awakening as well.

Since our readers tend to be kinky, do you like a romance novel with no kink?

There's more on what women like in their romance novels, but I thought I'd ask my readers what they like and see if it fits with what the authors say they like.

And who knew romance novels are a billion dollar industry? Hmmm. Maybe I should try to write one. LOL.

Your thoughts on romance novels.

FD

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Why Are We Like We Are?

I have come across a fascinating book called, "A Billion Wicked Thoughts.''

It is written by two neuroscientists who have a initiated a revolution in the scientific study of sexual attraction. They point out that very little sex research has ever been done. Kinsey interviewed only 18,000 middle class Caucasians. It was groundbreaking but not a broad sample. And people don't often tell the truth about their sexual desires. So they went to the Internet, analyzing the sexual behavior of more than one hundred million people around the world. They analyzed a billion web searches, a million websites, a million erotic videos, a million erotic stories, millions of personal ads and tens of thousands of digitized romance novels.

They point out that if you have a fetish, it is on the Internet. Nobody exists who has a desire that other people don't have. They say if you type in, "Find people that have sex with goat that are on fire'' and the computer will say, "Specify type of goat.''

They say men prefer plump women to thin ones and men often seek erotic videos featuring women in their fifties and sixties. So much for the supposed preference for thin young women.

I haven't even finished the book and will share more in the future but wanted to share one fascinating tidbit with you. In the history of mankind, only 40 per cent of men have reproduced while 80 per cent of women have.

They quote one social psychologist, Roy Baumeister, as saying what this means to us.

"If you (a male) go along with the crowd and play it safe, the odds are you won't have children. Most men who ever existed did not have descendants who are alive today. Their lines were dead ends. Hence it was necessary to take chances...Sailing off into the unknown may be risky, and you might drown or be killed, but if you stay home, you won't reproduce anyway. We're descended from men who took chances (and were lucky).
"For women throughout history, the odds of reproducing have been pretty good. Taking chances like (sailing off into the unknown) would be stupid, from the perspective of a biological organism seeking to reproduce. Women might drown or be killed by savages or catch a disease. For women, the optimal thing to do is go along with the crowd, be nice, play it safe. The odds are good that men will come along and offer sex and you'll be able to have babies. All that matters is choosing the best offer. We're descended from women who played it safe.''

I hope you find that as fascinating as I do. I recommend the book but will be sharing more of their findings.

FD

Friday, September 16, 2011

Thank You

My blog has now passed the 300 mark in followers and I just wanted to thank all of you who stop by and comment and become followers.

As regular readers know, I like to ask questions and so many of you have been kind enough to provide your thoughts and observations. I started this blog a couple of years ago at the urging of the lovely PK at elisnewbeginnings.blogspot.com and never expected to get the feedback I have gotten. I also want to thank all those lurkers who stop by and don't comment. I appreciate you reading the blog and ask you not to be so shy. Feel free to comment or become a follower. I should also thank Bonnie at bottomsmarts.blogspot.com for starting her Love Our Lurkers Day, which convinced me to start commetning.

As some of you know, I started this blog as a home for my Training Lisa series of fiction stories and somehow have let a year go by without updating it. One of these days, I plan to do that too.

Anyway, once again, I want to thank everybody who has welcomed me to this community. It is nice to find like-minded folks here to share our thoughts. And if you read but don't blog, feel free to start one of your own. We like to make everyone feel welcome.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

America in 2011

I suggest you read this link to a blog entitled, "Some real Shock and Awe: Racially profiled and cuffed in Detroit.''

It is about a n Arab looking woman traveling on 9/11 sitting in a row with two men she didn't know who were Indian and what happened to them when somebody said they were acting suspiciously.

It makes me wonder if we haven't if we haven't overreacted to the tragedy of 9/11.

Read the blog and tell me what you think.


FD

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Getting Wet

Following is a link to a post on the blog by pouredoutlett.blogspot.com.

If you click it on, it is about how she tends to squirt, but recently had two of what she calls Niagara Falls orgasms because she got so wet.

She asks by asking if any or the readers can relate to that so I will ask the same question.

Your thoughts?

FD

Friday, September 2, 2011

Being Normal


I found what I think is a fascinating story on the NY Times website. It is hard to describe it so I ask you to read it. If you do, I think you will find it interesting. And if you do read it, I would be interested in your comments.

FD




Townies

Townies is a series about life in New York.

Life in New York City requires the acceptance of a contradictory narrative about what loosely can be called ordinary existence. Even as a native of this city, I struggle to regard the punishment of its costs, the strain of its pace and the futility of its endless competitions — major, minor and residential — as normal.

But who’s to say what’s normal? It has been said that the only normal people are the ones we don’t know very well. But I disagree. Normal people, if they can be located outside the playpens of mythology and tall tales, are exactly those we do know, in our families and relationships, by choice or happenstance, or as is so often the case in this impossible city, out of necessity.

I thought about that a couple of weeks ago, in a setting abundant with the trappings of normal American life: one of my 5-year-old son J.P.’s peewee baseball games. The field where he plays sits in a little park off Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn, on a tree-lined block of brownstones in the shadow of the construction site that will one day be an arena named for a global financial services provider. There is a playground in the park, and on this humid early evening, children scrambled up the jungle gym and ran screaming through the sprinkler. Young men played pickup basketball on the asphalt courts adjacent to the field. Teenage boys capered about on bicycles and skateboards, vying for the approval of the girls on the church stoop across the street. Old men loitered on the park benches, furtively sipping beers camouflaged in paper bags.

He hit, sprinted the bases and high-fived his teammates, then me, then my ex-wife’s girlfriend.

Standing at home plate with J.P. (I volunteer as an assistant coach for his team, the Red Dragons), I offered a few (mostly useless) batting tips, made sure that his helmet sat straight on his head and reminded him to have fun. He hit, he sprinted the bases, and eventually, when he reached home, high-fived his teammates, then me, then my ex-wife’s girlfriend, Kathy.

We separated about three years ago, and I found out about Kathy a few months later. We had put our apartment up for sale, and I had stopped by to make sure everything was in order before an open house. I noticed that someone had left a phone in the kitchen, and when I picked it up I saw that the wallpaper photo was an image of my son.

I was fairly certain the phone was not my ex-wife’s, but to make sure, I called her. The abandoned phone remained silent, and when she answered, I asked if perhaps she owned a second phone. She said no, Kathy — I believe this was the first time I heard her name — had some carpentry skills and had been doing a bit of work and forgot it there. They would stop by later to collect it.

Rich Tu

There is something disorienting, to say the least, about finding a photograph of your child in the possession of someone you have never met. As a parent, the shock of realizing that your child has a life and experiences and attachments independent of you never completely fades. It’s worse for divorced parents. J.P. has school, friends, his mother, the world he creates when he closes the door to his bedroom and orders me to stay out. Most of the time, though, that alternate existence remains safely theoretical. Confronting it head-on stung.

At the same time, the person who took this photo clearly cared about J.P., and for that I was grateful. I also — and this is embarrassing to admit — felt a sense of relief. It would have been worse for me if the unknown figure in J.P.’s life had been male. A man, another possible father, someone with a better jump shot, more adept with a wrench and a power tool, wiser, taller, and more at ease — would have been a greater threat. The photo suggested to me nurturing and affection and the world of motherhood. I understand that what I am describing is sexist and silly and an awful generalization. But it helped, and it still does.

(This is in marked contrast to the reactions of some of my friends and family members, who assumed that my ex’s sexual preference could not help but emasculate me, and worried that I might enter some panicked phase of male sexual overcompensation.)

J.P. took to the field and Kathy and I stood on the sidelines watching. We chatted amiably about J.P.’s summer camp and his eating habits (he will, apparently, consider a wider range of fruits and vegetables when in her care than in mine or his mother’s); the pleasures and irritations of my ex-wife’s large, loving and contentious Vietnamese family; and whether my ex-wife and Kathy felt pressured to wed now that New York’s marriage laws have been amended to reflect the new, and more just, consensus.

When the half-inning ended, J.P. sprinted in from first base, flushed, panting and demanding water. Kathy handed him his water bottle and patted him on the head while he drank.

Kathy and I are far from friends, but it’s easier to communicate with her than with my ex-wife, and so, when possible, I include her in the complex and fatiguing logistics of our shared parenting. In that light, our conversation during the game worked as kind of domestic diplomacy, a step along the path to knowing each other, a road that hopefully ends at a new normal.

The normal I am thinking of was in evidence on the ball field, too, in a way that I imagine would be hard to find outside of New York. The challenges and obstacles of this city throw people together in ways that encourage the intimacy that results in the ordinary. J.P.’s teammates on the Red Dragons come from families of wide diversity, a cross-section of class, race, income and sexual orientation. To watch them is to see change mingled with tradition, with ease, without judgment. It was the end of summer and children were playing baseball: what could be more normal?


Theodore Ross

Theodore Ross is the author of the forthcoming book “Am I a Jew” and a contributor to the blogDadwagon.